(Jonathan Harford's Livejournal)

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The Outer Puppets is busting at the seams from its tremendous volume of creative juices. I left the theater feeling invigorated by the designs, the rich wit, the smart and playful performances, and not least because of the seductively immersive score played live by musicians Naa Koshie Mills, Dan Sullivan and Beth Thomason. If I were to look at the work from on high I would write about its examination of our destructive urge to outclass our mere humanness. But that wouldn't do justice to the work's ribald spirit. So as a mere human I'll just say: This is one cool, rockin' show.

The cable, please. Please repeat after me:

This ethernet cable I connect to you as a token of my love and devotion to you. [J repeats] I pledge to you all that I am and all that I will ever be as your husband. [J repeats] With this cable, I gladly marry you and join my life to yours. [J repeats]

By the power vested in me by the Universal Life Church and Winkel and Balktick, I pronounce you man and wife. You may kiss the Internet. I present to you Mister and Professor Harford-Internet.

1. I don't eat breakfast most mornings, 'cause by lunchtime I'm ravenous no matter what.
2. I'm terrible at keeping the house clean.
3. I'm not dead-set against the existence of god, but I think if it/he/she does exist, we're all owed a really good explanation.
4. I often play video games with cheat codes and walkthroughs... I like the art more than the challenge.
5. I buy too many silly t-shirts.
6. Most of the people I hang out with these days are "burners" AKA people who go to Burning Man (or at least regional burns).
7. I love my freaky little poodle, who is having minor surgery today.
8. I want to be as conscious as I can, but often find myself on autopilot instead of experiencing things afresh.
9. Even if I can't always be rational, I try to keep one eye on rationality from wherever I'm standing.
10. I sometimes find it hard to believe something as great as the internet exists. All that inexpensive art and information, not under the control of a government or corporation?
11. I meditate every morning. I think it's productive even though I think I'm not that great at it.
12. In one month I'll have been with my first girlfriend for 15 years.
13. I rarely go far out of my way to exercise. It's a horribly inelegant method of body maintenance.
14. I watch all TV shows via the internet or Netflix. TV commercials make me a little angry.
15. I got my driver's license when I was 26. I don't like to drive.
16. I'm a vegetarian because I think the suffering we put meat animals through is indefensible. I like milk and eggs, though, so I'm a hypocrite.
17. I keep lists of words, names, and jokes on my phone for quick reference.
18. I sometimes window shop for strong magnets on eBay. But I don't buy them since I don't have a lot of use for them.
19. I read books on my phone more than I do physical books, due to my crowded subway commute.
20. I love things that can make me laugh more than just about anything.
21. I don't plan on having children. I like children and think we'd actually be good parents, but have yet to find a compelling reason to make one.
22. I love performing and witnessing bad karaoke.
23. I can write my name so that it's vertically symmetrical yet still (fairly) legible.
24. I really like listening to mashups and against-the-genre song covers.
25. I'm planning to have my head frozen when I die, assuming death hasn't been cured by that point. No, seriously.

1. Creaky Boards - Brooklyn
2. Rowan and Hastings - My Favorite Bears
3. Walter Meego - Forever
4. Dabrye - Truffle no Shuffle
5. Juicy Karkass - Punch Em In The Dick
6. Stimmhorn - Wududu
7. Eef Barzelay - I Wasn't Really Drunk
8. Miss Li - Why don't you love me?
9. Daniella D'Ambrosio - Friday Night Saturday Morning
10. School of Seven Bells - Chain
11. Senor Coconut and his Orchestra - Da Da Da
12. Basia Bulat - Oh, My Darling
13. The Trucks vs. Tim Young - Titties
14. Fourth of July - Heart Attack
15. Fake - Stop Identity Theft Before You Happen

• Candy (for “nice” bag) ✔
• 10 Porn DVDs (for “naughty” bag) ✔
• 10 tubes of lube (for “naughty” bag) ✔
• 10 pregnancy tests (for “naughty” bag) ✗- the 99¢ store was out!
• Cough syrup bottle of whiskey ✔
• Windex bottle of blue cocktail
• 6 booklets of carols ✔

WASHINGTON—African-American man Barack Obama, 47, was given the least-desirable job in the entire country Tuesday when he was elected president of the United States of America. In his new high-stress, low-reward position, Obama will be charged with such tasks as completely overhauling the nation's broken-down economy, repairing the crumbling infrastructure, and generally having to please more than 300 million Americans and cater to their every whim on a daily basis. As part of his duties, the black man will have to spend four to eight years cleaning up the messes other people left behind. The job comes with such intense scrutiny and so certain a guarantee of failure that only one other person even bothered applying for it. Said scholar and activist Mark L. Denton, "It just goes to show you that, in this country, a black man still can't catch a break."

An Iowa City man who thought a police officer just "needed a hug" faces several charges including assault on a peace officer and public intoxication.

In pronouncing upon a debate, they don't try and determine whether a candidate's responses correspond to existing reality, or whether he or she is capable of talking about subjects such as the deregulation of the financial markets or the devolution of the war in Afghanistan. The criteria are far more vaporous. In this case, it was whether Palin could avoid utterly humiliating herself for 90 minutes, and whether urbane commentators would believe that she had connected to a public that they see as ignorant and sentimental. For the Alaska governor, mission accomplished.

I've been asked said questions a number of times this morning. Here's the scoop:

On Thursday, Leah (my better half, whom many of you know) went to the St. Vincent's ER with a 104.5 fever. After two failed attempts to treat her with various antibiotics (she had allergic reactions to both) she was admitted. The next morning, her fever was much lower. She had a spinal tap to rule out meningitis (it revealed nothing). Then they took her blood and found out she had an extremely low platelet count (150 is normal, she was at 19). Her white blood cell count was also normal, which didn't make sense for a bacterial infection. Freaky! So antibiotics were stopped. Then she was scheduled to have a therapy dog visit, but they never showed up.

On Saturday she had a CAT scan, which also revealed nothing. But her fever didn't come back, and her platelet count went up to 26 (not a huge improvement, but the right direction). We watched a lot of Season 1 of Weeds, despite the fact that we're wary towards Showtime dramedies, but it's actually a pretty good show when the humor doesn't get too broad.

On Sunday her platelets were up to 50. She still had bouts of nausea and headaches, but those were probably from the spinal tap more than anything. Today she's feeling even better. She just had her IV out and took a shower. She still very weak, but will hopefully be going home this afternoon!

What happened?

Flashback: Two weeks ago, Leah took a course of antibiotics for cellulitis. It knocked it out tout de suite, but (like a good AB-taker) continued the cycle. The favored theory is that these antibiotics gave her the fever - and then treatment (AB allergies, spinal tap, lack of therapy dogs, etc.) just made her worse. Crazy, right?